I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse. 「The Godfatherだろ?」
「嫌とは言えない申し出をする、ロビン 次の一発(ヒットつまりatomic bomb)はどうだ?」
Elementary, my dear ロビン. The Adventures of Sherlock “SMITH”? 「基本だよ、シャーロック・スミス君」
Here’s looking at you, kid. 「君の瞳に乾杯」
The stuff that dreams are made of. 「夢が詰まってるのさ」 The Maltese Falcon 「マルタの鷹か、、、オマエがハンフリー・スミスになりたいのか?」
Listen to me, mister SMITH. You’re my knight in shining armor. Don’t you forget it. You’re going to get back on that horse, and I’m going to be right behind you, holding on tight, and away we’re gonna go, go, go!
私の2005年買ったwall and piece には
「あのratさん(イーストン2002relaxmax撮影)」載ってないけど!!!!いつのwall and pieceから!載ってるの?2006年以降の「アレ(hanging man)」のってるのも!2023年に古本で「偶然!」relaxmax本人に発見されるまで、、、
LOST HUMAN anarchic romanticism of youth 2046 In past life, at the observatory of Palenque ライン77 the Seventyseventh 2074 Hologram : r’s brain : a short story Neo Tokyo 2007 title: “…And Dog has gone Somewhere… FOREVER!” Rhyme for Christmas Time Night was Tender
I Baked bread (as always!) at Home! the day before yesterday, it was around sunset…I don’t know why but…
I was sleepy
too sleepy
almost dying like “To Build a Fire” by Jack London,
I was scared…
if…
I die, if I SLEEP!
that kind of “drawsines”
almost like COMA?(if I sleep?)
-
why?
Anesthesia?
so sleepy
too sleepy
to be “AWAKE”
don’t know why…
I just ate Bread… so why?
SLEEPY SLEEPY SLEEPY!
It was just “normal bread!( Japanese syoku-pain kind tho!)”
ingredients are…
bread flour (Eagle Americano!
yeast
water
salt
sugar
butter
c’est simple comme bonjour (or should I say bonsoir?)
–
“Why am I so sleepy
(X’ post 12 hours ago…)
a bit scared… so
I thought
it was Okay, but…
something in it,
butter or ?”
-
“No I am just sleepy
so should be Okay!”
(it’s not “something”)
X’s post 12 hours ago
–
These are my X’s post. (12 hours ago)
After that article I read on newspaper (someone broke in somebody’s house and… her coffee cup or something? … anyway, she was okay but… was it something “poisonous? or… something in her coffee cup”),
I just remembered that article, so
I was scared…
After I ate bread,
I felt so sleepy like Jack London’s “To Build A Fire”…
Maybe!
it’s “Butter (something oily!)”
It’s difficult to tell which one (from ingredients) but…
OIL has no smell and no taste at all
and
if you eat Bread (as always…)
You might SLEEP and never WAKE UP!
stomach absorption
Oil is clear and colorless and have neither taste nor smell
something like this in Butter (at home? someone broke in and I didn’t realize…?…and someone put “SOMETHING” in MY BUTTER! at HOME! like that incident I read on newspaper…)
You’ll be sleepy as soon as YOU EAT!
(but! it’s just NORMAL BREAD! as always! tasted just like “NORMAL”!)
after 30min or so, sleepiness is bit easier…after 3 hours…much easier , but it was still going on…I was trying not to sleep coz I had fear of… If I sleep I DIE! (like Jack London’s short story), then 12 hours later? I woke up …but my body was still feeling tired and kind of “HEAVY”…
WHY?
I WAS
SOOOOO
SLEEPY?
(some professional … doctor or emergency? rescue worker or…anesthesiologist could tell more?)
-
something in it
at Bakery
in your town
THE THIRD BAKERY ATTACK
not TOKYO SARIN ATTACK … that was today 30 years ago…not like second one (in Murakami’s novel) Oh, sure, that was
Bakery in your town,
might BAKE as USUAL…just ordinary BREAD!!!,
SELL and you just EAT? and DIE?
terrorist attack!
not SARIN
this time … “BREAD”!
that kind of NOVEL?
I never heard of…
ー
BUTTER
Delivered “AS USUAL”
Boulanger
Baked Bread “AS USUAL”
and people(just ordinary people like me or you!)
Bought Bread “AS USUAL”
It was LUNCH TIME
in TOKYO (? Kasumigaseki? politicians? or Shibuya? kids or…)
ORDINARY
people
just ATE BREAD and DIE…
“Bon appétit!”
(…he ate 2 or 3…? Ah!…sleepy and he fell a sleep and never WAKE UP!)
THE THIRD BAKERY ATTACK
(it’s just a short story by relaxmax)
Terrorists attacked Bakeries around Tokyo…(its 30 years later …1995 Tokyo Sarin Attack…this time! not underground, it’s Bakeries!)
Terrorists changed cloth in Tokyo Toilets! (like Sumire? Sputnik Sweet Heart? Micky Mouse Socks? They wore?)
Terrorists broke in bakery. (before “THE DAY”! they broke in and changed frames of WINDOWS…! so for them it was easier to break in??? Impeccably equipped terrorists?!?!)
… and OF COURSE!
BUTTER (something in it! …er… once you eat, you never WAKE UP kind of…)
…
zzz
…
…
Michi Mugino (a pseudonym : not real name…means wheat road in Japanese! … a pseudonym like “Miss pain au chocolat san”)
works for “Boulangerie Swansie”
just
Baked
bread as USUAL
BREAD!
Pain au chocolate o
Pain au Raisin o
Croissant o
Pain de mie o…
(she is crying )
“…ah…I didn’t know! when I came to Boulangerie (she lives near work place, she can cycle to her Boulangerie),…it was just “NORMAL DAY”, nothing special!… I didn’t see any sign of “Break in”!!!
when I was baking…
it was just beautiful smell as USUAL!…BUTTER? …oh!…no! It’s “JUST BUTTER! “…nothing special really!..so WHY?”
She did NOT know AT ALL!
coz
Terrorists are Terrorists (professional JOB was already DONE!)
“I JUST BAKE BREAD”
“AS USUAL”
(Michi Mugino said…)
and
“USUAL CUSTOMERS”
(some strangers sometimes!)
“PAIN AS ALWAYS!”
“déjeuner!!!”
“on their way to WORK place (…they might be POLITICIANS? if they are working in KASUMIGASEKI? “
BOUGHT BREAD
as
ALWAYS!
ー
Monsieur A (he used to be “KID A in 90s OF COURSE!”) in his 50s,
he was on the train…Marunouchi line on that DAY… TOKYO SARIN ATTACK in 95!…after that, he couldn’t take “underground”…it was too traumatic experience!
But 30 years later,
time has passed…now he can take “UNDERGROUND marunouchi line” (sometimes he did remembered “that day! TOKYO SARIN ATTACK 95″ tho…)
“Times change. People change,”
and…he…
JUST BOUGHT BREAD
at “Boulangerie Swansie”
EAT
and
DIE
Boulangerie USUAL
His Fav…Pain au Chocolat
5 or 10 minutes?
Bread in his stomach!
quick déjeuner^_^
“ah… I’m sleepy”
(this was his LAST WORD!
coz he never knew he’s not going to AWAKE!)
(He kept sleeping
His LIFE = END)
“La fin”
THE THIRD BAKERY ATTACK
by relaxmax
written in English 14:57
22 March 2024
(Tokyo SARIN ATTACK was in 1995
so…how many days till 30 years?)
-
Terrorists Attack?
no… SARIN? CULT? what?
…
Novel
is
Novel
(this is just a short story!)
…
stomach absorption
Oil is clear and colorless and have neither taste nor smell
Once you EAT,
(Bread or … “something oily” in it) you’ll
“IF”
Boulangerie in your town
just Bake Bread
as
Usual
(Of course! they don’t realize “break in, and Butter (something in it)”…)
or
Bakeries are Terrorists! (they hide till 30 years from Tokyo Sarin Attack!)
➖
“I myself have adopted the position that, in fact, we never choose anything at all. Things happen. Or not.”
The Second Bakery Attack
by Haruki Murakami
➖
When?…Oh, sure, that was
“The time of the bakery attack,”
“The bakery attack? What are you talking about?”
And so it started.
(… on “THAT DAY” after 30 years! TOKYO SARIN ATTACK ’95!)
あんなふうに
産みたくなかった
頼まれても
Didn’t want to
but
She did coz XX(or who?) asked her to give birth
だから
体外受精で
戻す
そんなふうな便利な出産方法(relaxmaxが昔suggestされたイギリスのIVF)があったのなら
そうしたかった
so
She thought
She wanted to give birth “K” as IVF if she knew about “in vitro fertilization”
As a tummy! just a tummy for a BABY K (coz XX wanted to)
出産する
産みの母にはなれる
Just a tummy!
She could be… if she “KNEW”
The WAY
だけどセックスで産む
BUT
SEX
and
GIVE birth “K”
セックス
SEX
そうしたいわけではなかった
(選択肢でさえない
技術?
モラル?
国の違い?)
She didn’t want to have SEX
but she did (coz XX wanted to have “A BABY”…( Dose this “A BABY” … could be “someone else not him”?)
A way? (which she didn’t know if there was “another way”!)
(it wasn’t “A CHOICE”,
just SEX (not IVF? “in vitro fertilization” technique!
Moral issue? what? it’s “MY” LIFE! (not yours!)
If she were born in a different country…she had “CHOICE”?
君のことを
愛していない訳ではないけど
She said
“I LOVE YOU”
“BUT…”
あんなふうに
セックスして
君を産みたいとは
思えていなかった
“I must say”
“I didn’t want to give birth…”YOU”!”
“SEX…and YOU are here!”
無理して産んだ
“I didn’t want to”
だからこそ
の
「もし」
so
She started to think about
“IF”…
(coz she needed to)
産みの母
としてなら
君のことも
別の形で愛せたかもしれない
“AS a tummy (without SEX!)”
“I COULD LOVE YOU”
“in a different “WAY”…”
XXさんが君の父
XX is a FATHER
(そう 夫は別)
(yes my Husband is not XX)
それは
お互いにとっての
ある種の癒し
This was some kind of understanding
Healing
For Both
母に充分に愛されていない
母に嫌われることをする(してやる!)、、、どうせ嫌われている 愛されているわけではない
K was thinking
“My mom didn’t love me (there is always “NOT ENOUGH”!)
“I DO something naughty! (I WANT! to be naughty!)”…coz K knew MOM didn’t love him in a way…”I AM NOT LOVED coz I came here this planet EARTH with “UNWATED SEX” with “A GUY”(K knew it’s XX) not mom’s HUSBAND!
そういう、、、
生まれる前にはなかった
Something
SCAR in K’s SOUL
K didn’t have it
before
he was born…
産まれた後に!
彼が自分でつけた傷!
母と息子
After K came to this planet Earth,
K hurt himself, his SOUL
Mother and SON
母には愛されない
(母からしたら 充分に愛しているのに! もっと要求される 疲れる 無理 無理をしない 愛ではない)
K knows
“MY MOM NEVER LOVES ME ENOUGH”
(and she was thinking…”ah I LOVE K but he never knew” … K is demanding “ALWAYS MORE!” tiring
NO! I CAN’T DO “MORE”! better not to force me to LOVE K more…THIS IS NOT LOVE)
嫌うわけでもない受容
NOT “NOT LIKING” … ACCEPTANCE
受容の仕方
最近まで知らなかった
How to accept their “GIVE BIRTH” as MOM and SON
they didn’t know till…
いくつになっても
早くも遅くもない
Doesn’t matter if We are “grand ma and…” kind of AGE
not too late or JUST FINE
ただ「ココ」だっただけ!
It WAS “TODAY” (we call it “HERE”)
ー
君は子供の頃から気づいていた
(大人で気づく人は案外いない)
“You knew it” (xx is your father and my husband is different GUY)
(Other “people” didn’t really notice about “IT” UNEXPECTEDLY)
“since you were a child”
ただ
“不可能の
「もし」!の家族”
JUST K didn’t really “KNOW”
it’s “impossible”!
if WE ARE “REAL FAMILY”! (like his older brother? if HUSBAND (that’s what mom call him) is MY DAD…
にいつでもなりたかった!
愛の欠如
HE WANTED TO BE
something impossible
“LACK OF LOVE”
欠乏感
というより
「欠如」(だって「違う」と知っている!)
Suffering
WANT MORE
“NOT” real
“I”am (that’s what K knew)
K wanted “UNREAL FAMILY”
…”4 of US is REAL”…something NEVER COULD HAPPEN!
ー
母の心の声は聴いた
K heard
his MOM’s voice of her HEART
ー
結論
君が君だったから
そうなった
“IN CONCLUSION”
(it’s just “A POINT”)
K is K
coz
You are “YOU”
so I don’t love YOU
coz…(why you are SO BAD?)
ー
君のことは嫌い
あんなふうに
セックス
“I don’t love you”
“…why you did?(something wrong to HUMAN BEING)”
“…(ah I shouldn’t give birth “WITH SEX”(…that’s what she couldn’t accept “HERSELF”!)
君のことは嫌い
(本当の言葉はここで隠す)
“I don’t love you” MOM said
(…and relaxmax hide “TRUE WORD” here… coz THERE IS REASON)
なにか違うことを
「母」は息子に
すでに言った!
MOM said
to her SON
“I don’t love you… (and something going on… what relaxmax hide as “word” in “a story”)”
Already
they MOM and SON
said and heard…!
ー
それは
彼が「彼として選択して!」そうなったから!
彼の「生き方」!
Because!
it was Her SON’s CHOICE
“HIS CHOICE”(he had “CHOICE” and he DID!)
HIS WAY of
“LIFE”
ー
ー
ー
本当のことを言わないで!
(知っている 僕が誰の子か)
“Don’t tell me TRUTH”
(I know
I am not “my mom’s husband’s kid)
ー
本当のこと
隠したくて
K wants to
hide
TRUTH
ー
の理由が
今ならよくわかる
Now K knows himself MORE
(acceptance? No! WAY! okay! I’ll tell lies!)
ー
子供の受容
インナーチャイルドを愛すること
ACCEPTANCE of
“their” inner child
TO LOVE
and FORGIVE
to
“TELL THE TRUTH (I am not loving my son)”
ー
本当のこと
隠したくて
嘘をついた
でまかせ並べた
He wants to
HIDE something
True Feeling
LOVE
(coz K knew MOM didn’t LOVE him in the END)
so
“I’ll always
TELL LIES!”
K always tells
whatever comes “NOT TRUTH”
(coz WANT! LOVE!)
“I want to be LOVED”
“LOVED CHILD? never!”
ー
あの歌詞を思い出す
relaxmax remembered
“THAT RYLIC (she used to listen in her teenage ERA!)”
ー
本当のことへと
動き続けよう
(そして辿り着きたくはない!
だってすでに「知っている」から!
僕はこの家族ではない、、、と!)
K wanted to
MOVE BACK FORWARD!
(…and he never ALIFE?
coz K knew “I AM NOT LOVED coz when I came to this planet EARTH… the WORLD is NOT MINE!” (MOM never LOVED ME! coz she wanted to be “JUSDT A TUMMY!” not MY REAL MY MOM AND…(DAD? fuck!)
K moved somewhere
there is NO TRUTH so…
(but he knew HE NEVER BE! LOVED CHILD! this is what K didn’t want to ACCEPT!)
でも
不可能を求めた
「この4人が
本物の家族!」
幻なんかではなく!
BUT!
K
wanted
something “TRUE”
“THIS IS TRUE FAMILY!
4 of US”
not a illusion
at ALL!
ー
母と息子
MOM and SON
ー
くりかえすこともある
repeated FAMILY history
sometimes happens
(who saw “a jacket” “a boy(son?)” “a… boy?(is he your…? No he is not mine)”
KIDS
are
YOURS?
alright?
ー
何度か
その陰を見る
Saw
shadow
of DEATH
ー
そうして
あの
犬を思い出す
then,
relaxmax
remembers
“THAT DOG”(not illusionist anymore! coz K chooses to become “something different”!)
ー
犬になった僕は
もう、、、(ミラージュをみせる、煙幕をみせる、、、ある種の、、、)
K as a Dog
doesn’t have to “bark”
anymore
(illusions, YOU SEE? (coz K WANT) NOT TRUE! coz TRUTH is TOO HURTING! MOM doesn’t LOVE ME “in the END”!)
彼女には会えなかった
ことを知る
K knows
that
he couldn’t MEET “HER” as relaxmax
(永遠にたどり着けない、、、というわけではなかったのに!)
(there is a WAY (coz relaxmax is a time traveller) … 0 to distance to LOVE…(K knew MOM didn’t love him
BUT!)
0を無限に目指すのではないのだから!
「答えがある!正解がある、、、この世界!」
0
is
0
a point? fuck!
THERE IS
AN ANSWER
Answered Prayer
THEY HEARD!
infinity in 0
PERFECT ANSWER
there IS!
ー
犬になった彼を見た
彼女は
relaxmax
ONCE
SAW
a dog in a distance
ちょっと遠くの方にいる犬としての「彼」を見て、、、
A dog (of course relaxmax knows it’s HIM! K! as a dog)